“HOW ARE YOU?”

I hate this question. If I’m honest I usually have no idea how I’m doing.

WHICH AREA OF LIFE ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

You have a perfect morning with your family and transition into a hard announcement at work. You book your next vacation and an hour later you pull your hamstring. You have a fist-pumping meeting followed by a fist-pounding meeting. So many things are swirling around in our that it’s hard actually know how we’re doing. Leadership is a mash up of good, bad, boring, exhilarating, frustrating and fulfilling. All of it.

If we’re honest, the real answer to, “how are you” is usually, “it’s complicated.” If we’re struggling with self-awareness it’s a challenge to lead ourselves, let alone others.

A few years back I started realizing how bipolar (not clinically speaking, of course) my thoughts can be in the course of a week, a day, an hour. I took nearly a year to shape four repeatable questions I use on a weekly basis and in nearly every coaching session I lead. Here they are…

Where am I thriving? This invites us to recognize the good and celebrate it.

Where am I struggling? This invites us to discern the barriers and pray amidst the struggle.

What is confusing right now? This is an invitation to seek clarity and take the next step toward it.

What is missing right now? This is an invitation to wholeness and take the next step toward it.

Scribble these in your journal in the morning. Start work meetings with them. Ponder them on your evening walk.