I connect with a lot of young, passionate humans who want to change the world. Many are looking for their chance to find a ministry position where they can make an impact. Many of them sit and process with me when their break didn’t work out and someone else got the position. They feel dejected and passed over. Perhaps you’ve felt the same.
At the beginning of the book of Acts you will find something perplexing sandwiched between the suicide of Judas and the rise of Jesus’ church. As the apostle team find themselves one short they go through the process of replacing Judas. The scriptures must be fulfilled as it said, “Let another take his office. (Acts 1:20)“ What was the qualification for this new member?
They must have accompanied the apostles during all of Jesus ministry. That way they would have heard all of Jesus’ teaching and studied him as he embodied that teaching. They would have been around for discussions, debates and prep sessions. They would have already sacrificed their lives to follow Jesus, they just weren’t officially on the squad. They were the water boy who was there for every practice and game, but didn’t make it into the team picture.
There were only two people who fit this criteria: Justus and Matthias. So, how did they decide?
Acts 1:24-26 tells us: they prayed and said, “You, Lord, who know the hearts of all, show which one of these two you have chosen to take the place in this ministry and apostleship from which Judas turned aside to go to his own place.” And they cast lots for them, and the lot fell on Matthias, and he was numbered with the eleven apostles.
Such a crucial decision. Two good candidates. Matthias is chosen, and Justus is still off the team. That’s the last time we hear about Justus in scripture. Maybe you can identify. Maybe you’ve said something like, “God, I want to make an impact for you!”, we say with deep longing. “Why won’t you let me.” What’s worse is at times we’ve felt like God was giving others some taste of the influence we greatly desired and had already sacrificed for.
What was God doing here? Why didn’t Justus get chosen? What lesson was He teaching?
I have no idea. God wanted Matthias on the team and not Justus.
We must be careful not to personalize everything in ministry. Just because God doesn’t give you the influence you deserve or put you in the position you would like doesn’t mean he doesn’t love you. The apostle team pressed on and the great movement of God called “the church” was birthed as God desired. God still loves you, and God will still get his glory.
Maybe you feel like Matthias where God has pulled you off the proverbial bench and put you in the game suddenly. God seems to put his hand of influence on people who have journeyed with him for a long time, but often influence expands in an instant. There will be seasons of our lives where doors seem closed, and we find ourselves longing to enter into rooms of greater influence. God has shaped me when I felt like Matthias and when I felt like Justus. It’s really not about us.
Dear Justus, God still loves you.